We’ve talked about what happy couples do, like have frequent sex, compassionate arguments, and positive interactions. But being in a happy relationship is about more than what you do—like sending flowers or cooking a romantic dinner. It’s about who you are at your core. What your values are. And those values drive your behavior toward your partner and everyone else you interact with.
There are commonalities people share who are in successful relationships. These people are:
- Kind. Happy people don’t save kindness for the office or social situations. They are kind through and through, even—and maybe especially—at home. Common courtesy isn’t so common anymore, but it’s a boon for any relationship. A “please” and “thank you” shows your partner you are appreciative of their efforts, even for small things. An act of thoughtfulness can go a long way to ease conflict and cement a relationship. Compassion for your partner can only enrich your relationship.
- Supportive. People in good relationships are available to their partners when they need them. They give their full attention when one needs to talk, and they communicate their feelings. They are open to their partner’s ideas. They can always be counted on when their partner needs them—to share problems as well as joys.
- Best Friends. They enjoy each other’s company, and would rather be with their partner than any one else. They are open to the different perspectives and experiences their partner brings to the relationship. They have a sense of humor and know how to jolly up their partner when life isn’t going well.
- Committed. Through thin and thick, happy couples never waver. Their loyalty and devotion to their partner is steadfast. They never give their partner any reason to doubt their fidelity. Or their word. They do what they say they’re going to do. They work through difficulties. They are in it for the long term and they behave that way.
Couples who are in a great relationship bring out the best in each other.
They experience the Michelangelo phenomenon in which they see the best in their partner and ‘sculpt’ them to make them as beautiful as they can be. If you are lucky enough to be in a relationship like this, you help shape your partner to develop his most ideal qualities. And he does the same for you.
Nancy Travers is a professional counselor based in orange county. If you need safe, effective counseling services, please get in touch. Call directly: (949) 510-9423
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