Are You Close to Someone with Narcissist Personality Disorder?

When you are a close relative, partner or friend of a person who suffers from Narcissist Personality Disorder (NPD), you suffer too. People with NPD have an escalated sense of their superiority and importance in the world and a constant need for attention and admiration. They often have little regard for others\’ feelings and may even exploit others to achieve their own goals. These traits can be detrimental to those who are close to the NPD sufferer.

Causes of NPD

The disorder can be rooted in a dysfunctional childhood in which the afflicted felt highly criticized, unworthy and unloved. A total lack of affection or empathy left the child feeling vulnerable and perhaps shameful. Sometimes children in these situations grow up to need ultra power and control so they never have to feel the horrible sense of vulnerability or rejection. When these people become adults, they mask their low self-esteem and shame with arrogance, superiority and demands for priority treatment.

It can be very trying to be close to someone with NPD, who often appears to function normally in public, and even excel at work or in social situations. Then, in the privacy of the home, the NPD person can flip a switch and become aggressive, demeaning, illogical, accusing and controlling in the extreme. If you are a spouse, family member, or friend, this treatment of you may distort your thinking process. You sometimes give up your own sense of self to become what the person with NPD needs you to be. You may sacrifice your well-being and even lose your own self-esteem in the process of taking care of the NPD person\’s emotional needs.

Are You at Risk of Being an Emotional Caretaker?

If you are generous, empathetic, deferential and want to help—all good things, usually—you are at risk of putting the person who suffers from NPD before yourself. How do you know if you\’re in a negative situation? If you think you may be, it\’s helpful to seek therapy. Ask yourself:

Is any relationship, even a bad one, better than none at all?

Is your self-esteem low?

Do you feel the need to be a rescuer?

Do you need to be needed?

Do you feel responsible for someone else\’s emotions?

Do guilt and obligation dominate your behavior in relationships?

Do you care about the person with NPD more than s/he cares for you?

Do you hate conflict and avoid it like the plague?

If you answer yes to any of the above, you may find yourself in a relationship in which you are the rescuer and sometimes the victim. You could become the unwitting caretaker of someone else\’s emotions. If you are in such an unhealthy situation, you may be an emotional caretaker. It may be time for you to take care of yourself to achieve the happy, rewarding life you deserve. Therapy can help.

 

Nancy Travers is an Orange County Counseling professional. If you need safe, effective counseling services, please get in touch. You can reach her here: https://nancyscounselingcorner.com/contact-us.

 

 

If you found this post helpful, you might also enjoy exploring some of our other articles that dive deeper into the topics of relationships, communication, and emotional wellness. Whether you’re looking to strengthen your current connection, better understand co-dependency, or prepare for a healthy marriage, these related posts offer valuable insights and tools to support your journey. Take a look—you may find just what you need.

Related Posts

Rumination vs Reflection In Relationships

Ah, going even deeper — I love it.When it comes to relationships, the difference between rumination and reflection becomes even more personal and powerful. Here’s the breakdown: 💔 Rumination in Relationships (Emotional Looping) Result:→ Builds emotional walls.→ Increases insecurity, distance, and mistrust.→ Prevents healing or meaningful change. ❤️ Reflection in Relationships (Healing and Growing) Result:→ Builds emotional insight and compassion.→ Deepens connection and understanding.→ Leads to healthier behaviors and growth.

Read More »

Is She/He Right for You?

In the rush of a new relationship, you stay up all night talking. You can’t stop thinking about him. And every minute you’re away from him seems to drag in slow motion. You’re in the first stage of love, and your hormones are racing. You can’t think straight. Because you are human, there’s no getting around your physical reaction. You are designed to bond, and in so doing, your body

Read More »

Gaslighting vs Respect

That’s a really important contrast to look at — gaslighting vs. respect in relationships — because they sit on totally opposite ends of the emotional health spectrum. 🔥 Gaslighting (Disrespect in Disguise) Gaslighting is a form of emotional manipulation where one person makes the other doubt their reality, memory, or feelings. It often looks like: “That never happened; you’re just being dramatic.” “You’re too sensitive.” “You’re overreacting.” Twisting facts to

Read More »
RELATIONSHIP COUNSELING SERVICES

Find The Counseling Service That Is Right For You

At Nancy’s Counseling Corner, we’re here to support every stage of your relationship journey. Whether you’re navigating challenges in your marriage, preparing for lifelong commitment through premarital counseling, or working through the emotions of separation and divorce, our services are designed with care, compassion, and expertise. We specialize in Marriage Counseling, Relationship Counseling, Premarital Counseling, Divorce Counseling, Co-dependency Counseling—and so much more. No matter where you are, healing and growth are possible. Let’s take that next step—together.

Marriage & Couples Counseling

Marriage is a lifelong commitment that requires hard work, love, care, and understanding the needs of other people.

Relationship Counseling

Can help you find–and keep–the love of your life. Relationships are challenging and require an extensive amount of patience.

Divorce Counseling

Divorce Counseling is an emotional and strenuous thought for those seeking to solve marital problems.

Depression Counseling

Depression is a mental disorder characterized by at least 10-14 days of noticeable or recognizable low mood.

Co-dependency

“Codependency” is a term we hear thrown around a lot these days, though many of us aren’t sure exactly what it means.

Premarital Counseling

Offers Premarital Counseling to couples in the Orange County area that are considering to get married or are already engaged.

Anxiety Counseling

Offers Premarital Counseling to couples in the Orange County area that are considering to get married or are already engaged.

Meditation

Offers Premarital Counseling to couples in the Orange County area that are considering to get married or are already engaged.

Hypnosis

Offers Premarital Counseling to couples in the Orange County area that are considering to get married or are already engaged.