5 Reasons Addicts Should Reject Shame

If you or a loved one is an addict, remember this: It takes courage to face addiction. Often addicts feel shame in a society that fosters that feeling, but addiction is an illness. People who are ill need treatment. They need sympathy and support, not shaming. Here are some reasons why.

  1. Addicts can be anyone. It is an equal opportunity problem suffered by young and old, black and white, rich and poor, men and women. It is not because they are bad people. It is because they have a certain genetic make-up, or a childhood that predisposes them to risk, or they are part of a peer group that pushes them into it, or a combination of factors.
  2. Addicts do not deserve to suffer. Addiction itself is suffering enough without the added humiliation of punishment. However, addicts often do illegal things to sustain their habit. Some will lie, cheat, or steal to obtain their drug. But when they are under the influence of drugs, they are, by definition, not themselves. They need help, not humiliation.
  3. Addicts have a certain neurobiological make-up. Recent studies show that some people are more predisposed to becoming addicts than others. And once they do use alcohol or drugs for a prolonged period the structure of their brain alters, making it more difficult for them to break their habit. Their brains become more hard-wired to their addiction, and they become less able to control their need for drugs or alcohol.
  4. Addicts of illegal drugs are no different from addicts of prescription drugs. Somehow people think it’s less of a problem if your drugs are prescribed. And of course, it shouldn’t be a problem if people use those drugs as directed. But when people take prescribed drugs more frequently or in larger doses than specified by a doctor, then they can become addicted. In fact, they can be just as addicted as people who take illegal drugs. No matter what drugs plague an addict, it takes the same amount of courage to overcome the problem.
  5. Addicts recover better without shame. Research shows that sympathetic therapy—as opposed to confrontational shame-inducing therapy—improves recovery results. There are those who think addicts respond to shaming, and possibly think addicts deserve shaming. But this kind of negativity repels most people and makes it less likely that they’ll want to seek treatment. And, it perpetuates the stigma of addiction. By understanding that addiction is a disease, and by using a positive approach, therapists can develop better long-term relationships with patients. And addicts can enjoy better, more long-term success in recovery.

Nancy Travers is an Orange County Counseling professional. If you need safe, effective counseling services, please get in touch. You can reach her here: https://nancyscounselingcorner.com/contact-us.

 

If you found this post helpful, you might also enjoy exploring some of our other articles that dive deeper into the topics of relationships, communication, and emotional wellness. Whether you’re looking to strengthen your current connection, better understand co-dependency, or prepare for a healthy marriage, these related posts offer valuable insights and tools to support your journey. Take a look—you may find just what you need.

Related Posts

When You Feel Like Roommates But Want to Be Lovers Again

There comes a time in many long-term relationships when couples pause and realize something has quietly shifted. They’re still sharing a home, raising kids (or pets), managing finances, and getting through the day-to-day without major fights. On the surface, everything looks fine. But underneath, the spark feels dim. Conversations stay practical. Touch is rare. The romance that once felt effortless now seems like a distant memory.  In my therapy practice,

Read More »

When It’s Recommended to Seek a Divorce Counselor

The end of a marriage is rarely a single moment. It’s a long unraveling: of shared identity, daily routine, financial stability, family structure, and the future you thought you were building. Whether the decision to divorce feels like a relief, a devastation, or both at once, the emotional terrain is almost always more complex than anyone anticipates. A divorce counselor like Nancy Travers doesn’t just help you cope. She helps

Read More »

What is the Gottman Method for Couples Therapy?

Not all couples therapy is created equal. Some approaches are largely intuitive, shaped by a therapist’s personal style and experience. The Gottman Method is something different: a rigorously researched, evidence-based framework developed over more than four decades of studying what actually makes relationships thrive or fail. For couples feeling stuck, distant, or caught in cycles of conflict, it offers something rare: a clear, structured path toward genuine repair and connection.

Read More »
RELATIONSHIP COUNSELING SERVICES

Find The Counseling Service That Is Right For You

At Nancy’s Counseling Corner, we’re here to support every stage of your relationship journey. Whether you’re navigating challenges in your marriage, preparing for lifelong commitment through premarital counseling, or working through the emotions of separation and divorce, our services are designed with care, compassion, and expertise. We specialize in Marriage Counseling, Relationship Counseling, Premarital Counseling, Divorce Counseling, Co-dependency Counseling—and so much more. No matter where you are, healing and growth are possible. Let’s take that next step—together.

Marriage & Couples Counseling

Marriage is a lifelong commitment that requires hard work, love, care, and understanding the needs of other people.

Relationship Counseling

Can help you find–and keep–the love of your life. Relationships are challenging and require an extensive amount of patience.

Divorce Counseling

Divorce Counseling is an emotional and strenuous thought for those seeking to solve marital problems.

Depression Counseling

Depression is a mental disorder characterized by at least 10-14 days of noticeable or recognizable low mood.

Co-dependency

“Codependency” is a term we hear thrown around a lot these days, though many of us aren’t sure exactly what it means.

Premarital Counseling

Offers Premarital Counseling to couples in the Orange County area that are considering to get married or are already engaged.

Anxiety Counseling

Offers Premarital Counseling to couples in the Orange County area that are considering to get married or are already engaged.

Meditation

Offers Premarital Counseling to couples in the Orange County area that are considering to get married or are already engaged.

Hypnosis

Offers Premarital Counseling to couples in the Orange County area that are considering to get married or are already engaged.